Looking after yourself as a carer
Honest, practical ideas for protecting your own health and wellbeing while caring for someone else — from people who have been there.
By the Personal Care Records founders 2 min readUpdated 25 September 2026
For years we were so focused on our daughter’s needs that we ignored our own. Missed GP appointments, broken sleep and constant low-level worry caught up with us. Caring is a marathon, and you cannot pour from an empty cup. These are the things that helped us most.
Recognise the signs of carer strain
Carer stress builds slowly and is easy to dismiss. Watch for:
- Constant tiredness that sleep doesn’t fix.
- Feeling irritable, tearful, numb or hopeless.
- Withdrawing from friends and activities you used to enjoy.
- Neglecting your own health appointments, eating poorly or drinking more.
- Feeling resentful or guilty — both are very common and don’t make you a bad carer.
Reduce the mental load
Much of the exhaustion of caring is invisible: remembering appointments, tracking medicines, chasing referrals and holding every detail in your head. Writing things down in one organised place moves that load out of your mind. When information is shared, other family members can step in without needing a long briefing, and you can take a break knowing nothing important lives only in your memory.
Accept help — and be specific
People often say “let me know if you need anything” and then wait to be asked. Keep a short list of concrete tasks others could do: cook a meal, pick up a prescription, sit with your loved one for two hours, mow the lawn, drive to an appointment. Specific requests are much easier for friends to say yes to.
Plan regular breaks
Respite is not a luxury. Even a few hours a week to do something just for you — a walk, a coffee with a friend, a class — helps sustain you over the long term. Explore formal respite options early, before you reach breaking point, so that you and your loved one can get used to new carers gradually.
Look after your own health
- Keep your own GP appointments and health checks, and tell your GP that you are a carer.
- Protect your back: ask for training in safe moving and handling techniques and use the right equipment.
- Prioritise sleep where you can, and talk to your GP if night care is leaving you chronically sleep deprived.
- Move your body in ways you enjoy, even for short periods.
Where to find support in Australia
Carer Gateway (1800 422 737) offers free services for carers, including counselling, coaching, peer support groups, practical skills courses and planned or emergency respite. Your state carers association can connect you with local support. If you are feeling overwhelmed or unsafe, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 at any time, or call 000 in an emergency.
This guide shares general information and lived experience. It is not medical advice. Always follow the guidance of qualified health professionals, and in an emergency call 000.
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